By nature, I am a very calm person. It takes quite a bit to get me upset, and similarly, it also takes a really special thing for me to get overly excited about. To some that can be seen as insensitive or boring, but to me, I have actually always secretly loved that about myself. Growing up when friends were sobbing over boys or getting into petty fights with one another, I was generally speaking on the sidelines with a slight eyeroll and a "who cares" attitude. (I had my moments - but don't we all!)
In the last handful of years, I cannot tell you how difficult it has been when I would suffer from feelings of anxiety. It came out of nowhere! There is a general "worry" that sets in once you're a mom - but that is different that what I am talking about. I am talking about up in the night, heart pounding, unable to sleep type worry that takes a physical toll on the body and mind. A physical pain that makes it difficult to catch your breath. As 2018 rolled around, I said "no more" and decided that in lieu of weight loss, Bible reading and family vacation goals -- I had one goal for the year. PEACE.
I came across a beautiful scripture in Psalms that has been my screen saver on my phone for the entire year:
God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved; God will help her when the morning dawns.
YES. Nothing new has happened, my husband and I are about to celebrate 10 years of marriage, my "baby" is almost three and has slept through the night for 2 years now. So what is this "thing" that is attacking my peace?
Growing up in church I had the tendency to look around me - my actions, my intentions, and my motives. What was I doing wrong? Was this a sign of something to come? Is this some sort of a warning? Then I realized no! That's not it. Although this unidentifyed burden was heavy, it was not mine to carry. I needed to cast my cares. I needed to invite the Lord to fight for me. On my behalf. For my family. For my capacity. And for my mind.
I feel like the entire world has collided on the topic of Anxiety (although I do not call it anxiety. I call it "feelings of anxiousness" because the Bible clearly states "Do not be anxious about anything, instead, pray about everything." Anxiousness is a common emotion and we don't need to be afraid of it.)
One of the best remedies I have come across is music, specifically worship. I want to link a song below that really helps me when I am feeling down! I hope it can help you too!
"Peace Be Still"